Months 3-6: Silliness, Sweetness, and Slowly Coming Out of the Blur
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Takeaways
-This is the time when his personality really started to shine- babbling, smiling, giggling and really taking in the world around him and deciding how he felt about it!
-Embrace the snuggles, the contact naps, the nursing, every little cuddle you can because they are beautiful, special, fleeting, and if you don’t stop and enjoy them they’ll be gone in a flash.
-Every new stage and phase that happens becomes my new favorite with him. When I was in this stage I loved it but now my current stage is just so special!
-Even though you’re through the “fourth trimester”, if you’re feeling like you should have it all figured out by now (that’s how I felt anyways- like I should know what the heck I was doing) lower your expectations and give yourself the grace you deserve. I truly did not start to feel lighter and more like myself until he was around 7-8 months old (I talk about that in the next blog post- Months 6-12: So Much Fun and So Much Growth.
-If you aren’t okay mama, it’s okay to speak on that and ask for help and talk to people who can help you through that. Even if you think you should be out of the intense postpartum days. Postpartum technically lasts for 2 years and possibly even longer depending on how long you breastfeed for.
-I highly suggest looking into pelvic floor physical therapy. My body was struggling which only did my mental and emotional health a disservice too. More about my experience below in the Mom Life section.
-Continue to trust your God-given mama instincts. Don’t get desperate, don’t compare, don’t let social media tell you how to mother, don’t let others tell you how to mother. God equipped you for this job for this babe at this time.
Months 3-6 here we go!
The week that Easton turned 3 months old was the biggest rush of emotions I had felt since the roller coaster of emotions right after he was born. I could not believe my little babe was three months old already. I was a mess.
I made a post about things I learned from my fourth trimester and reading it back now I can feel all of the emotion and thought in those words and what I was feeling at that time. And now I feel so much more clarity. I didn’t realize that I was still in the midst of the blur (and honestly I’m pretty sure I still am a bit) but I felt so many emotions when Easton turned 3 months old. And then whoa, an even bigger burst of emotion when he hit 6 months! Can you tell I am incredibly sentimental, sensitive, and nostalgic?
So let’s chat about the in-between of those emotional monthly milestones!
In these months when he was 3-6 months old, it felt like Easton was changing every single day! In just three short months he went from still my little newborn to a curious, wanting-to-be-indendent, babbling babe! When people say it goes quickly- they aren’t lying. The BEST part of this phase was seeing his little personality start to shine!
Easton turned three months old in the heart of basketball season in which Wyatt coaches and Easton’s big cousin plays. So most of his time was spent watching basketball- and goodness he loved it. Taking him to so many games in the evenings and weekends felt overwhelming at times (okay, most of the time) but we truly could not have asked for a more easygoing babe- he just loved to be out and about doing things. He even slept right through his uncle playing in the pep band at most of the varsity basketball games!
This phase of months 3-6 for us began in the winter in basketball season and ended in the spring. And as the weather started to get warmer, I came out of the blur bit by bit. The blur is what I refer to as my postpartum/new mom life phase where everything is just new and feels so unknown and just so exhausted and trying to figure it all out- it’s blurry!
But like I said above I truly feel like each week got easier and more fun. Being a stay at home mom is my favorite thing but it did have its own challenges especially in the beginning.
Because the big 3 for babes are eating, playing, and sleeping, all of these blog posts from my babe’s first year of life start off with those sections then dive into other topics from this stage, followed by a mom/parent life section. The headings will help you navigate. I really tried to cover as much as possible to be an encouraging and supportive resource for you in these seasons of life.
Let’s jump right in!
Eating
Easton has been exclusively breastfed since day one and never took a bottle. I never pumped either initially. If you read Months 0-3: Newborn Life, New Normals, and Neverending Love you know we started trying a bottle every few days when he was about 2 months old and he was never interested. Throughout this phase of 3-6 months we continued to try here and there with breastmilk, but he always preferred to nurse and there was never a time I absolutely had to be away so I put down the stress of trying to make it work and continued to nurse him every 2-3 hours. I’m so grateful for our breastfeeding journey.
I also wanted to share this because I feel like there’s a lot of pressure if you’re nursing to make sure you’re also pumping and have a deep freezer stash of milk and I couldn’t wrap my mind around it all. I don’t pump regularly and never really have. Because he is exclusively breastfed I do collect some milk using the Haakaa ladybug and this milk collector and that way I can freeze some for future use or in case of emergency if I ever did have to be away or became unable to nurse.
If you’re nursing and don’t need to be away from your baby or for them to take a bottle don’t feel like you need to pump constantly and have some massive breastmilk storage saved up. There’s just not enough hours in the day and you may drive yourself crazy!
At this point I still didn’t have any clear cut goals of how long I planned to nurse for, but we both had such a successful start to our breastfeeding journey that I didn’t need to think about stopping or weaning at this time.
Also, I know for some it’s a big deal to start baby food and purees during this stage, but we did not. I talk more about our food journey in the next blog post Months 6-12: So Much Fun and So Much Growth.
Playing
This is the time when playing started to really feel like playing! He started being able to pick things up and hold them, everything went to his mouth of course, and the time he was awake was longer so we got to fill our days with more playtime. Yay!
From about 3 months on we didn’t leave the house without several toys in the diaper bag and then eventually had to always bring a separate well stocked toy bag with us everywhere we went. This child just loves to play and go from toy to toy!
By the end of our days at home we have every toy out and have played with it all!
He also loves when we read him books. At first you might feel a little silly reading to your babe since they don’t really know what’s going on, but they love it!
On my Instagram I actually started sharing his favorite toys each month on stories to help other mamas. I love how his preferences change each month as he develops new skills!
It was also during this phase he was able to start playing in his play table. And I think it was just as good for him as it was for us. Having a babe that never wants to be put down is great because that bond is so strong- his love language is definitely physical touch- but it can make it tough to be able to go to the bathroom or get ready to go somewhere or cook a meal. His play table allowed for a little bit of independence for both of us in small increments. I think we felt like he was ready to try his table around 5 months when his head/neck/core control felt strong enough.
Sleeping
Easton has never been a great sleeper but we have adapted and learned so much along the way. I know one day he will sleep longer stretches when his mind and body are ready to. I see sleep as a developmental thing, a skill he will eventually learn. And in the meantime I will be well caffeinated. My child comes before everything, so if sleep support is what he needs it’s what he gets! If you read Months 0-3: Newborn Life, New Normals, and Neverending Love then you know he didn’t start out as a great sleeper and while I was hoping that as he got older it would improve, I feel like my body simply adapted to the new normal of less sleep. God designed mamas incredibly well like that.
Also if you read Months 0-3: Newborn Life, New Normals, and Neverending Love then you know he had a tongue, lip, and cheek, tie revision that was still healing as we entered this phase. And once he did fully heal, many of his symptoms that made him uncomfortable subsided. This did help him to become a little more comfortable when napping and sleeping which we were so grateful for.
We ‘contact nap’ for every nap every day unless we are in the car and those snuggles are the best! Occasionally I would get a little overwhelmed and feel like I needed to put him down in his crib or bassinet to nap, but it just wasn’t for us. Either of us. That stress and pressure I was putting on myself of wanting him to nap on his own lasted for maybe a few days here and there until I gained some perspective and just became grateful for the bond that we have and the snuggles I get on the daily. The stress I was feeling was really me trying to convince myself I needed to do things a certain way instead of just leaning into my own instincts and what felt right for us! I talk alot about those God-given mama instincts in Months 0-3: Newborn Life, New Normals, and Neverending Love and how important it is to trust them.
I know this can be a controversial topic and I’m very heavy on the ‘do what’s best for your family’ so I’ll be honest- we do not believe in any sort of crying it out and since about month 5 we have safely bedshared for the second half of our nights. It’s what works for our family and I strongly believe in trusting the instincts that feel right for your baby. Before he is in bed with us he is in his own sleep space in our room. And once it hits about midnight/1AM when he wakes up I move him into our bed. If you aren’t sure what this could look like for you- google safe sleep 7 for cosleeping.
Now don’t get me wrong we have had our rough nights, our especially restless nights, nights we tried to fight through constant wakings, nights we tried to put him in bed with us to sleep and he wouldn’t go for it, and nights where I wish I had a little more space, but nights like that are few and far between. This started for us at about month 5 I believe. When he was younger than this I would try to put him in bed with us to see if that would help him sleep and he hated it. But eventually he came to love it and that’s how we all can get a little more restful sleep now.
The level of anxiety and stress I would have leading up to bedtime before we implemented this change was massive. I wouldn’t even talk, I would just shut down because I was already in my head about how awful bedtime and the night were going to be…I was gearing up for battle. Once I started putting him in bed with us halfway through the night, all those pre-bedtime emotions dissipated. I have no negative feelings going into bedtime and our nights now which allows me to enjoy our sweet bedtime routine so much more!
It was during this time that we were really able to start implementing that bedtime routine and it’s the same routine we still do and I love it. If possible, I would have implemented a bedtime routine sooner, but because basketball season didn’t end until Easton was about 4.5 months old, we had a lot of late nights and it just didn’t work for our family to start doing this until then.
Here’s our bedtime routine:
- Bath (on non-bath nights I wash his face and head with a warm washcloth to relax him)
- Lotion- body lotion with coconut oil and goodnight lotion from Earthley with magnesium
- Diaper and Pajamas
- Sleep Sack/sleep suit
- Read a book
- Nurse to sleep
It took some time for this routine to go super smooth and some time also for Easton to really recognize ‘okay it’s bedtime and time to wind down’ and while I’ve never wanted to force him on a schedule, this bedtime routine really helped to get him some better sleep but also some time for Wyatt and I to get some consistent time to hang out too! A win, win.
Schedule and Routine
That was the perfect lead-in to talk about our schedule and routine for him…aaaand there isn’t one. I knew even during pregnancy that I simply wanted to take his lead on things when it came to any kind of structure in our day to day routines. Take his lead as in- temperament, personality, sleep, and nursing patterns.
This bedtime routine I just listed above that we implemented during this stage was really it. I know that some kids at some points can thrive with structure, but I simply didn’t feel like it was something that was right for him and us at this point in his life.
It has always just been very important to us to never put him in any kind of a box when it came to schedule/routine because we want him to thrive when we travel, when we go run around for the day, have something fun planned, etc. And for me, I have always been a planner and thrive on structure, but as a mom you see things differently. I thrive on structure, but he was not a baby that would have thrived that way.
I’m sure there are experts and other moms out there who would disagree with me on that, but as I have and will continue to say in these blog posts about his first year of life- trust your instincts and do what is best for your family.
There may be a child in our future that thrives as a baby on structure and routine. I think that is a big reason why I am sharing all that I am in these blog posts. To serve as support and encouragement, but also remind that every child and mama are different and that is A-OKAY!
Teething
The stage of 3-6 months is when all the slobbering and chewing on everything really goes into full force. Putting things in their mouths is how they learn about things so having lots of teething toys on standby was perfect.
Easton turned two months old right after Christmas and all of his stockings were filled with teething toys so we were set! Even with all the toys though, he still loved to chew on his hand and my fingers- which was fine with me until he started cutting teeth then it hurt!
Easton cut his first teeth- his bottom two in the center- right before he turned five months old. I was not prepared for him to have teeth this early on as some babes dont cut teeth until much later but it was his time! This was a new challenge with nursing but we have learned and adapted since then. He only gets super bitey on the days when they first pop through the gums and he doesn’t quite understand what the new tooth is in his mouth. Thank goodness biting did not last long!
As far as discomfort with teething here is what helped us.
These and a whole lot of snuggles and patience!
So now that we’ve chatted about Easton in months 3-6, I also want to share the mom life side of things from those months as well.
Mom Life
I already kind of touched on a few of these things in my takeaways at the beginning of this blog post, but I want to dive in deeper because if you’re a mom in this stage currently I want you to know you are seen, understood, valued, and doing an amazing job.
When Easton turned three months old I really felt like I should be out of the blur, know what I was doing, be confident in every bit of motherhood, have a sleeping baby, and just really have it all figured out. And let me tell you…my expectations were WAY too high. And because of that I felt like a failure.
At 3 months I was still very much a new mom in the trenches but I felt like I should have been out of that by then. I felt like I should be a supermom and I wasn’t and that took its toll on me mentally and emotionally.
I also didn’t feel like I was doing great physically either. My body felt so uncomfortable all the time and just felt foreign to me. Which is where I’ll start with my own little subheadings in this mom life section.
Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy
A couple weeks before Easton turned 3 months old I started pelvic floor physical therapy and that is what got my body finally feeling good again. As women, our bodies go through so much through pregnancy, then delivery, and then life with a newborn and breastfeeding too. So needing some assistance to get back to a place of feeling physically capable again was necessary for me and I’m so glad I did that. I truly think every woman should at least be evaluated postpartum by a pelvic floor physical therapist.
I went to Fitness Matters and they have several locations. I went to the Grandview location and saw Ashley and she was amazing. I cannot recommend it enough! My body went from not even feeling like my own, to a much stronger, capable me. I can’t remember how many visits in I was when she asked me to do a squat. And I panicked inside. Like, can I even do a squat anymore? Mind you, if you read First Trimester: Sickness, Sleepiness, and the Sweetest Blessing then you know I couldn’t/didn’t workout my entire pregnancy so it had been like a year since any workouts had happened for me. But I did a squat, and when I tell you I was proud of myself! Slowly learning my body’s capabilities again was a game changer for me.
I took my mom with me to every appointment so she could hang out with Easton for the hour since I wouldn’t be able to be away from him the full time frame of the drives and PT and I’m so grateful that I asked for help to be able to do this for myself. At times it was overwhelming to commit to these weekly appointments, but my body needed it so badly that it was affecting me mentally too. Once my body started to feel better, that helped my mind!
Postpartum Body
I think this is also a really good time to remind the mamas to not compare yourself to other mamas. In mothering styles but also in size and weight postpartum as well. Some women lose weight gained in pregnancy very easily and some don’t. I am one that has not lost it easily and I would have my moments of getting down about it, in this season of 3-6 months especially, but that constant reminder of what my body did and was capable of in pregnancy and bringing my son into this world ultimately outweighed the negativity. But if you are a mama struggling with this, I see you.
I feel like it’s important to point out though, that you can carry weight differently after pregnancy too. So much has changed physically that the weight distributes differently and that was odd for me to get used to. My weight has fluctuated a lot in the last 15 years, but I never carried weight in the places I did in the way I did after having Easton. It’s like after pregnancy I had the extra weight that I had gained, but I was carrying weight differently than I ever had, and that’s a tough adjustment too. Seeing your body in a different size, trying to become physically capable and strong again, being grateful for what your body did, and also different areas of your body carrying weight differently, like so many things to adjust to all at once it seems! In this season I had yet to figure out how to fit regular workouts into our routine but I knew someday I would get there!
And in the meantime I wasn’t going to put too much pressure on myself to do so. I think that this was probably my biggest challenge and also biggest lesson in this season— I originally set my expectations way too high and then had to reset them and give myself grace and learn a better mindset around things.
And while we are talking about physical changes postpartum, I can’t not mention postpartum hair thinning/loss. As if it’s not hard enough to look in the mirror and at times see a body you barely recognize- then you start to lose your hair!! This was the stage when my hair thinning/ loss was the worst and I used this oil and this leave-in conditioner. Both contain rosemary oil which can decrease milk supply, but I did not have this issue.
SAHM Mindset Shifts
For me as a SAHM…I’ve always been a person all about productivity and getting things done and there were so many things I just simply couldn’t do while taking care of Easton. And initially that really stressed me out until I shifted my mindset. I’m a stay at home mom not a maid or a chef or anything else and my main responsibility is Easton. So while it’s nice to be able to get some of those other things done- they can wait. And Easton needing me won’t.
Married Life Post-Babe
I mentioned this when I was chatting about Easton’s sleep but during this phase was when Wyatt and I started to have some time to spend together again. Now part of this was because Wyatt was busy coaching until Easton was 4.5 months old but nonetheless if you’re in the trenches just know you and your partner will get to spend time together again! I’ve heard it called the roommate phase with your partner and I think that’s super accurate. In these early days you’re both just run ragged trying to keep all the tops spinning and the plates balanced and it feels like if one falls they all fall. And then you add in postpartum hormones and goodness gracious at times you wonder how you’ll ever make it through! But you will.
It was also during this time that Wyatt and I went on our first date since Easton was born! Now it was a lunch date and my parents ended up driving Easton around the entire time because he was so upset and then he finally relaxed and fell asleep, but we had our first date!
During this 3-6 month phase we also felt comfortable to leave Easton in the baby room during church. Now I’ll use this as a shameless plug to brag on Cypress Church’s amazing kids team. I knew that he would be well taken care of, loved on, and have so much fun but leaving your child for the first time with others is scary! So we took some time to do so until we both felt fully comfortable, and even now we still don’t take him every Sunday if I would rather keep him with us or in the mothers room. One more way you just absolutely have to do what’s best for your family and don’t let yourself feel pressured!
And I *think* that pretty well sums up Easton’s stage of life from 3-6 months old! What a wild time of life that was, but such a blast. I am so grateful to get to be his mom and watch him grow. It’s all bittersweet, but God designed us all so perfectly in the way we grow, change, and develop from these tiny little newborns all the way up into the adults that we are to be able to become parents. My mind just boggles thinking about all the blessings and God’s perfect design and perfect timing too.
Lord, thank You for the beautiful gift that parenthood is, and the gift of these sweet babies in our lives. Lord, I pray for the parent whose little one is in this developmentally-explosive stage that they can take a step back and soak in the beauty of it all. I also pray for the parent putting way too much pressure on themselves to have it all figured out and feel like they have it all together. Lord, we know there is know way we can truly have it all together without You. Please be with us in all the stages of our little ones’ growth and development and give us the guidance and strength we need to parent them well. Jesus, we thank You for all the blessings in our lives. Amen.
All the love,
